Mistaken Song Lyrics/Titles

On a lighter side, I had another one of those aha-so-that’s-what-they’re-really-singing moments the other day. A cool thing about SiriusXM radio is the titles of songs are displayed when they are playing, and sometimes you find out you’ve been singing along incorrectly.

I have two examples. The most recent happened with Tony Joe White’s “Polk Salad Annie.” I thought it was “Folk Sallie Annie.” I know, I know, it doesn’t make sense, but not all titles and lyrics do. So I became curious what Polk Salad was. It’s a cooked greens dish made from pokeweed. The song lyrics evidently describe a poor rural Southern girl and her family, so poor, in fact, they have to eat polkweed. I researched polkweed from in the Southeast: All parts of the plant are poisonous and although boiling removes some of the toxins,  the American Cancer Society and food specialists caution people NOT to consume it in any form.  Someone had commented on a website that he saw it for sale at a farmers market. Yum. Let’s get us some. (See above photo.)

The other example happened years ago when my husband and I rented a silver Mustang convertible in San Antonio and drove to Mustang Island listening to Sirius for the first time ever, and feeling pretty cool. (That was a fun trip, but I digress) The Marshall Tucker Band came on singing “Pretty Little Love Song,” only that wasn’t the correct title. It was “Heard it in a Love Song.” We had a good laugh over that one, as that’s how we both heard it. I’d love to hear about yours.

 

 


PREREQUISITES FOR THE POSITION OF PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA

Since potential candidates are already building their coffers and assembling their team of vermin to plot how to destroy potential opponents, it’s time to think about what qualifications and characteristics we want and need in our next POTUS. Here’s my wishlist.

  • Knowledge of the constitution of the United States. (Could there be a test candidates volunteer to take to prove they know what they’re doing?)
  • Knowledge of the American and world history. (Another test.)
  • Knowledge of the government: how laws are made and congress works. (Test!)
  • Works to unify the country and encourages congress to cooperate to pass bills  for the good of the people. I know. I know. Big controversy on what that is with Democrats and Republicans, but I’m thinking middle ground and compromise like  it’s supposed to work, so congress can get something done. (Play nicely and work together people!)
  • Keeps abreast of current world/country events.
  • Listens to others’ points of view, especially advisors who may know more than the pres.  (Think intelligence agencies and scientists)
  • Conducts his/her adult life with decorum and sense of morality.
  • Knows the difference between fact and opinion.
  • Has diplomatic skills (Doesn’t feel a need to insult opponents and leaders of other nations, or anyone who has a contrary view or opinion.)
  • Understands every single solitary word he/she utters (or writes) is going to be  scrutinized by the entire world and cares how those words and actions affects the United States of America.
  • Views allies as allies and treats them with respect.
  • Strong understanding of ethics with a track record of ethical behavior.
  • Respectful, thoughtful, introspective.
  • Views and treats all law-abiding Americans with respect and dignity no matter what their race, religion, economic status, or political affiliations. (Knows Nazis, neo-nazis and white supremacists are bad.)
  • Understands a free press is VITAL to a democratic society.
  • Has a thick skin and a sense of humor.
  • Brave, but rational. (Think nuclear codes) Perhaps this one should be bumped up to the top of the list, although these qualifications are not necessarily in order of importance.)

We can learn from our mistakes, right?  Well, one can hope.

 


THE DARK SIDE OF THE LOON

I received word this week my short story, You Picked a Fine Time to Kill Me, Lucille, was accepted into the Twin Cities Sisters in Crime Anthology, THE DARK SIDE OF THE LOON,  which will be published in 2018. The stories are all centered around a historic event in Minnesota history. Mine was the “Halloween Blizzard” of 1991. I can’t wait for you to read it, and all the wonderful stories my colleagues have written. I’m truly honored to have had my story selected.


The Gym

Observing human behavior is not only essential for a writer, it’s also absolutely fascinating. Humans are many things including territorial. The first thing I noticed about my aerobics class for seniors was that people have their “spots.” If you, as a newbie, try to stand in their spot, you will be notified in one way or another you have committed an egregious act. For example, the offended person may come and stand right next to you. There’s no way you can exercise that closely, or you’d be smacking each other, so you’d best move. I go into the gym early to get a “spot” in the fourth row where I have a clear view of the instructor because I like to move in the right direction and use the correct arms and legs. Not all folks can copy the instructor’s movements, (or care if they are moving opposite the  rest of the folks in the room), and if they are standing up front, it can be sorta distracting especially if they  block my view of the instructor.  One day, quite at the last minute,  two women  I didn’t recognize tried to fit into one space to my left.  One  turned to me and demanded I move over. No please. No smile. Now I understand their desire to stand next to each other, but really?

Humans are diverse in their views of appropriateness. The locker room is a place where some women meet and chat before or after classes. Friendly women, pleasant women. There is one old plump woman who has a different view of modesty than I do being raised in a Catholic family where modesty was a virtue. She bends and stretches in the nude. I can’t watch even a millisecond of it. One day she was standing completely nude chatting with two or three others who were either dressed or in the processing of getting dressed. I couldn’t help but wonder if any of them wanted to tell her to get dressed for godsake. Maybe the nude old lady will have to end up in one of my novels.


Love ‘Em or Leave ‘Em Dead

I will be signing books at the wonderful Cherry Street Books on this Sat., July 8, from 12:30 to 2:00. Would love to see you there!

Layout 1


Generations Interview


Launch dates for Love ‘Em or Leave ‘Em Dead

You’re invited!

May 6, 2017, Excelsior Bay Books, 1:00 to 3:00

May 27, Once Upon a Crime, 12:00 to 2:00

June 3, Maple Grove Barnes & Noble, 12:00 to 2:00

Layout 1     When Sonya Donovan, a popular radio celebrity, and friend of the Birch County Sheriff, is found dead at her home in her bed, Detective Cal Sheehan assumes she died of natural causes. However, the autopsy results prove otherwise. Cal has to work around Sheriff Patrice Clinton who’s personally involved with the family to investigate those who have the most to gain from Mrs. Donovan’s death. The murder case soon becomes embroiled with a homicide in Hennepin County, and as Cal proceeds to untangle the bizarre set of circumstances, he uncovers a murder plot so roiled in deception and greed that lives and families are shattered
forever.